More Adventures in Tourism

I was talking to some friends about mega churches and how big they have to be. He went into detail about youth group size needing to be at least a thousand, then he proceeded to describe the churches' Skating Rinks or Bowling Alleys. I don't remember which, but does that part really matter?

I voiced my displeasure at such an emphasis on entertainment to the extent of having these in a place of worship.

In its defense, he helpfully added, "It's for the youth."

Sometimes, you just can't reason.

Corean Christmas

For me, Christmas week started on Saturday the twentieth. That afternoon I met a small group from our church to help deliver presents to a couple of orphanages. I waited with a Korean mom with three English-speaking kids in front of a van full of presents. The driver would be along shortly.

As we waited, some neighborhood kids strolled by playing with a plastic squeaky hammer and using bad language in Korean. The mother in our group promptly scolded the kids, who apologized. Her kids asked what they said, and naturally she refused to tell them.

Soon the driver arrived, and we were off. Within minutes we drove to the first orphanage, parked, and unloaded presents in a large dining area. I did some detective work by looking at the clock and reading the word "Jesus" and decided this must be a Christian orphanage. A better detective might have noticed the big pulpit behind me, but what can you do.

We shared snacks and called out names as the children ate. As a name was called, we gave out the respective gift. The lady in charge seemed to be asking the kids not to open their presents until Christmas. Some took the advice, but others couldn't wait. All were pleased.

We moved on to the second orphanage, where our church's pastor and his wife met us. We gathered the dozen or so kids, sat in a circle, and the mother in our group read the Christmas story from the book of Luke in Korean. Our pastor punctuated the reading with "this is why we celebrate."

After the reading, we sang a Christmas carol or two, played some games in Korean and English, then exchanged gifts with the children. They'll open them on Christmas day.

The following Monday Beka and I headed to a local church ministry to help bind quiet time diaries. They had "kyu tee" spelled out in Korean, which either meant Q.T., or cutie. I guess quiet times can be adorable.

That afternoon some missionary kids joined us and compared the work to destroying walls with a jackhammer. This was better by their estimation. I proceeded to debate how that was possible.
In the end, they won, as my point of view was vastly outnumbered.

Several hours and books later, we called it a day and made our way home.

Wednesday the twenty-fourth, I started the day as Santa. I half-walked, half-slid down icy steps to the subway, then met one of our school's former secretaries to impersonate the aforementioned Clause at a kindergarten.

I was ushered into a storeroom and shown my Santa suit, then asked to stay there until further notice. Great pains were taken to hide me, costume or no. Our friend later told me the reasons behind this covert op. Apparently, when she was young she asked her parents why Santa looked like her principal at school and her pastor at church. She wanted these kids to avoid such trauma.

The costume fit well enough, but Santa's coat kept slipping open revealing the Batman T-shirt underneath. This really was my plan when I got dressed that morning. The coat would fly open, and I'd be forced to admit "I'm not Santa. Santa's not real. I'm Batman."

The Batman shirt went unnoticed, as Santa's flying hat stole the show. It refused to stay on his head, and many six to eight year olds were amused, not to mention the four or five snickering adults. Oh, yes, I remember you, whoever you are.

I had several bags of presents and a list of names, written beforehand by their parents. I called a name, read good qualities and areas for improvement, then evened out the constructive criticism by forking over the loot. Santa did use his better judgment however, and refused to read "stop picking your nose" off one boy's list. There are some things that Santa needn't mention.

One girl looked like she was about to cry. Thankfully there were only positive notes on the list, but she still refused to smile, even with a present. The Santa hat continued to fly off my head. After the third or fourth time, she gave in and started laughing.

I managed a few more ho ho hos, a "Merry Christmas" or two, and hid until it was time to go home.

Later that afternoon I met some students, teachers and missionaries to sing some Christmas carols at a haukwan (tutoring school) ministry. We sang a few Christmas carols with explanations of what these Christmas carols mean and why they are important to us.

We were pleasantly surprised when we sang Silent Night and Joy to the World. The students joined in, and we learned they were practicing the words in English before they knew we would sing them.

We confirmed that many of them don't celebrate Christmas at home, so we explained what it means to us.

A few minutes later, we said our goodbyes, collected candy canes, and trudged back through the labyrinthine subway tunnels to work our ways to our respective homes.

He'll Be Back

This old Mad TV sketch still cracks me up and yet remains mostly reverent. Either way, it's appropriate for Christmas, so enjoy.

Culture Wars and... Coffee?

This Burnside blog post gets some good points across on some major culture war issues. And it's funny. Enjoy.

Proposition 9 Passes; Coffee Banned in Utah

Salt Lake City, Utah. After passing by less than 3,000 votes, Proposition 9, which outlaws the sale of all caffeinated beverages, roasted coffee beans, and teas, has sharply divided the Salt Lake community. Coffee drinkers and Starbucks employees have twice staged marches and demonstrations at the Salt Lake City Mormon Temple in protest of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints’ efforts in support of the Proposition.

Herb Heffernander, an employee of the local coffee shop, Awesome Beans says more protests are planned. “We’re just so mad that they would take this away from us,” says Heffernander. “It’s only motivated by religion and it’s splitting families apart.”

However, the strife is not limited to LDS church members and coffee drinkers; divisions are surfacing among the Mormon faithful.

“Doctrine and Covenants 89 simply states that ‘hot drinks are not for the body or belly’ and doesn’t clearly identify coffee or caffeine,” says Mormon Bishop Franklin Plopshelf. He also suggests that tea should be viewed in light of Joseph Smith’s revelation about herbs, which are for the use of man.

Many Mormons who supported Proposition 9 say it’s about the spirit of D&C 89. “Coffee is destroying this nation,” states Linda Low, a Salt Lake resident who worked on the Yes on 9 campaign. “It’s an abomination.” Low argues that Bishop Plopshelf is more concerned with the image of the church and it’s ability to reach out to the younger generation rather than a strict adherence to scripture.

The Local Coffee Roasters Association of Main Street has vowed to challenge the Proposition in court and more protests are expected. A claim of election law violations against the LDS church as also been filed by the Association, claiming that the church overstepped it’s tax exempt status by entering the political arena. The church has made no comment.

Those Damned Missionaries

My wife was teaching The Good Earth in one of her classes and pointed out an interesting passage. The main character, a struggling Chinese farmer, encounters missionaries. They hand him a piece of paper with Jesus on the cross and nothing else. This has extra meaning when we realize the author was a missionaries' kid who later turned her back on the faith.

Wes Anderson, author of Too Small to Ignore and head of Compassion International, was also an MK. He recalls an incident when his father took him to African villages with the hope of preaching from the Bible. One village was pretty much on the brink of death. Dr. Anderson's dad figured out their water supply was poisoned and took care of it. The people recovered and asked why he took so much interest in them. He told them, and it wasn't long before a church got started.

Later, the dad wrote an update letter to supporting churches telling what happened. To his son's chagrin, he left out the parts about helping people. Sheepishly, he explained the churches in the U.S. wouldn't understand. Young Wes Anderson walked away in tears.

It seems like I'm always having this conversation and always will until the day I die, but doesn't scripture point these things out? It does, and many of us are catching up, but why does it take us so long?

Physical and spiritual needs are both important, and the minute we ignore one we damn ourselves to disobedience. I hope we seek the least of these, but with purpose.

Culture Wars and Myvalues

I'll have a bit to say on culture wars in future posts as it's a pretty big topic, but the Christmas season and social networks such as Myspace and Facebook serve as a good intro.

Social networks are great. You can start a group or join a cause and invite others to join them. You can also (secretly of course) look down on them when they don't join your cause. Shame.

Some causes have immediate purpose and are fairly personal. My wife recently joined a group explaining her uniquely-named friend is in fact a real person and should be allowed to have an account. It also had an immediate effect as it worked.

Beyond that we get into the tricky part. My "end poverty" out ranks your "keep prayer in the school" and so on. And what shall we call Christmas? Simply put, who has the best cause?

I do think that drawing awareness to things we care about is good, especially when we're strongly convicted about them. I also believe (as I'll discuss in later posts) culture wars tend to lose sight of individual and church wide responsibilities. But the moment I turn the whole thing into a competition I lose sight of the point.

I can click and show my support for feeding the poor, but if I don't show love to people outside of my comfort zone and spend time with them it means nothing.

What's the best way to keep Christ in Christmas? Followers who reflect Him by giving meaningful gifts to each other and to others in need, with purpose. (By the way, I see this happen a lot during the holidays and it encourages me. The church is hungry for opportunities to serve and give.)

It seems common sense, but in an age of point and click, easy entertainment, easy service, easy evangelism, it's worth a shout-out at least.

In the meantime, I have to remember where values need to be. In ending poverty.

No, seriously. My causes are better.

Wimpy Theology

I was raised in a Christian home with certain notions of what it means to be a follower of Christ. Point number one was "don't water down the Gospel". So, as long as everything included sin and the death burial and resurrection of Christ, our basic Christian-ness remains unscathed. For many years, I agreed. Lately, however, I've begun to not edit but rather expand my definition of what that means. And that's where things get scary.

I've heard of a "wimpy theology", referring to any teaching on God that isn't soundly based on the Bible. But let's go beyond that. Wouldn't a weak theology be one that seems to require nothing of us? One that says "Pray this prayer, then read the Bible, pray, and continue your life as you normaly would"? Don't get me wrong, sin, a need for a Savior, and faith in Him are vital to the Gospel, but isn't leaving out Christ's teachings on people who hear the words and don't do them or those who see others in need and say "be fed" or "be clothed" and keep on walking at least a bit wimpy? Shouldn't all that reading and praying make a difference?

I'm not talking about works based salvation, as that would be a hopeless black hole (see "Adventures in Dogooding" a few posts back for one example). I'm just talking about common sense, sort of. If we have faith, it should make a difference in more than just our heads. But what gets stressed more? Or am I just overreacting? That's always a possibility, so I'm not ruling it out.

Please feel free to comment. A strong theology might include more than I even mentioned. What do you think?

Ball Pits and Christmas Cards

Thursday I had the opportunity to tag along with a group taking snacks and diapers to an orphanage. Part of its name actually refers to it as a town, and it has the size to match. We parked near the building where the children were and brought the supplies in it. Then it was time for a tour.

The children range from ages zero to four. A separate building houses unwed mothers. The building we entered kept children, some sensible toys, and the ultimate ball pit on the first floor. Most of the kids kept pretty busy.

One four year old found me and decided to give me a tour of the place. He led me by the pinky until a Poo Bear bicycle caught his eye. Then he decided to ride that instead.

Later he wanted to be held. Every time I'd start to let go, he would get more footing and wrap his arms around my neck. Thankfully, it was time to eat when we had to go, or he might not have let me leave. He has a good sense of priorities.

We promised to return, then made our way to our respective homes.

Friday I joined a meeting with students interested in going on a short-term missions trip to India or the Philippines. I assured those interested in India that India is not on the restrictive travel list. Another teacher added the fact that Mumbai is far and in the opposite direction from where we are going. Of course there were problems nearby, but thankfully those blew over.

Later that day I had some students make Christmas cards for elderly ladies in the Grandma House. I explained I would visit with some students and teachers the following day. Everyone used Korean, some used English, two used Japanese and one used Russian.

The next day a student would remind me the Japanese might not be a good idea, and I remembered some of the ladies were probably alive during the occupation. But I finally decided my students can't help who they are. And they did use Korean as well.

Saturday our PE teacher graciously drove our group to the grandma house, where we brought the cards and some towels as requested, then drank coffee and waited to be put to work. We didn't have to wait long.

We cleaned the floors, and I noted that some of our students consider work punishment. I was impressed as they seemed to enjoy themselves.

An hour later, we rinsed out our cleaning rags, ate some pears, then gathered up our list of Christmas carols. We spent the twenty minute ride teaching the songs to the students, as many didn't know them. This was not a good week for me to have a cold. Regardless, we sang without hurting anyone. That's always a plus.

Three songs passed, and it was time for the residents to eat. That seems to be our exit cue.

We said our goodbyes, then drove off to find a lunch of our own.

Feedback, or Death to the Monologue

After a refreshing vacation from blogging on this site I afforded the opportunity to have a thought or two. My default is, when in doubt, listen. I can blabber about my opinions all day, but I would learn nothing. So, I'll add a new format to the mix and see what happens.

I'll ask a question rather than just say what I think. If you're reading this, please comment and let me know your convictions, thoughts and interpretations on the matter. Thinking will ensue. I hope.

Here's the question. Is service a means to an end, or is it a way of showing the Gospel? I've heard people say that doing acts of service such as helping the fatherless and the widow, etc, is "a great way to tell them about the Gospel." But isn't the act a witness, a means of showing the Gospel? The question is, should the service be used only as a lead-in to a sermon, or can it be a witness as well?

Discuss.